Raising a Yes-Man Who Will Climb to the Top

Even though he won't hit terrible two for another eight and a half months, Jack's got the saying "no" thing down.  It's just that he uses actions, not words.  He starts to do something he knows he shouldn't (throwing his sippy cup off the table, for instance), then stops and shakes his head "no." Then as he's shaking his head, he does exactly what he's telling me he knows he shouldn't do.  Or at least what will make me say "no."  Ugh.  

So now we're working on learning to say "yes."  Any time I ask a question and either want him to say yes or know that he would respond affirmatively, I make an exaggerated nod, say "yeeeeesss" very slowly, and move Jack's chin up and down.  I think it's a good lesson to learn--say what you mean.  He thinks it's hilarious.  

For a while now I've firmly held to the conviction that Jack my no longer play with keys.  Not just not playing with my keys--not playing with any keys.  I know that means I'm being mean Mommy, and I'm glad that he's able to identify them and to attempt to say keys, but he was starting to throw tantrums when someone wouldn't give him keys, and that just won't fly with me.  Plus not generally letting him play with keys enables me to give them to him as an incredibly effective incentive to make Jack behave really, really well in certain clutch situations like when I had to take him with me to the eye doctor today.  That's double bonus time--no regular tantrums and reliable path to ensuring an extra-good boy.

But last week Jack shocked me yet again with his ingenuity and drive for obtaining keys.  We have a mudroom off the garage where we keep all our keys and bags and occasionally keep one

 of Jack's strollers when I plan on using it a lot and don't want to mess with carrying it down the stairs to the garage.  Generally I keep the door from the mudroom to the living room closed during the day, but I was trying to unload the car from our visit to Nonna and Pops' house last weekend, so I had the door open and the light on yesterday morning.  Jack loves, loves, loves to go into

 this closet-sized room, close the door behind himself, and play the "Where's Jack?" game wherein I ask, "Where's Jack?," he knocks on the door, I turn the doorknob (which he blessedly can't reach yet), and he opens the door wide and lets out a squeal of excitement that I take to mean, "Here I am, silly mommy!"  Add some of him sticking his fingers under the door and me wiggling mine back underneath in response and we've spent a good half hour at play.  Ah, the simple things. 

At any rate, last Wednesday Jack capitalized on my having left the mudroom door open and light on.  He went into the mudroom and closed the door as usual, but when he had spent a minute or so in there without going through the rest of his normal routine, I decided to go in to check on him.  Jack greeted me from the seat of his Bugaboo by holding out a set of keys and saying, "Dees!"  He had pushed his stoller over to the table where we keep our keys, climbed into the stroller (which I've never seen him do before), and retrieved the keys from their dish.  Persistent little boy.  

Crazy Mumbum

I'm going a little nuts, I think.  

Not nuts like the horrible postpartum depression I experienced last fall.  That debacle was seriously bad around the time I started this blog.  It only started subsiding in any meaningful way after we decided around Christmas that our move back to the US was imminent and I would say it wasn't really over until after we had been in our St. Louis house about a month (less than two months ago for those of you who are counting).  I've started to volunteer with a group called Mother to Mother that provides moms experiencing postpartum depression with support by pairing them with mentors in the form of moms who have gone through it before.  I'll have to go through some pretty extensive training in the fall before I actually get to help someone, but I'm very excited about the possibilities.

But anyway, that's not the crazy I'm going through now.

The crazy I'm going through now is a fairly benign kind mostly induced by a little boy who loves reading so much that he's made my shins black and blue.  How could reading cause bruised shins, you may ask?  Picture this: a mommy is trying to wash the breakfast dishes.  A little boy wants to hear "Don't Let the Pigeon Stay Up Late!" for the tenth time that morning.  So he brings it to his mommy and throws it to her.  Her knees don't make the catch.  She reads it.  He repeats.  Five times.  Before noon.  It's great, really, but I don't know how much more my legs can bear.

It isn't helped by the fact that this is Jack's idea of a fashion show:

"Manatee Baby" onesie was a very cute birthday gift from Uncle Stephen (and a meaningful one for those of you who know the story of Ben's 21st birthday).  Polar bear slippers are adorable, if I do say so myself.  And I find his penchant for Ben's socks adorable.  But all together?  The socks look a little like legwarmers.  And with that obvious pose?  As my friend Kristin is fond of saying, "The Eighties called.  They want you back."

The other main cause of my current craziness is that Jack is really starting to say "Dada" now.  This is a great development, and I'm really happy about it.  Occasionally it comes out "ah-da" (Dada minus the initial d sound), and sometimes Jack says it in reference to my cell phone (I'm assuming he's recalling talking to Daddy on the phone), but it's definitely there.  Not so about "Mama," which is the rub.  Except for a brief appearance in London (at which time I'm pretty sure he was instead saying "yum, yum" in reference to his food), the closest to saying "Mama" Jack gets is when he says "Mumbum."  I'm trying to be excited about it, but I'm really jealous.

Also Jack just finished his very last Ella's Kitchen packet, our miracle British-only pure organic fruit and veggies in a pouch.  Even though over the past month and a half he slowed down to eating only about one every week, and even though he now eats well and drinks tons of milk and yogurt from a similar pouch, it's a little unnerving not to have that safety net.

About the only evidence of my newfound craziness, however, is that I'm considering switching to cloth diapers.  Now hear me out on this one.  They're not as bad as they used to be; no pins are involved, and velcro and all-in-one innovations mean they go on just like disposables.  The brand I'm especially considering is called Bum Genius and was created by a mom in St. Louis but has become a big name in reusable diapers worldwide.  The only difference is that we would have to rinse smelly diapers off over the toilet (FYI, according to basic sanitation standards and diaper packaging, that's supposed to be done with disposable diapers as well!), and would have to wash the diapers every other day.  That and the fact that they'd be slightly less expensive even if we only used them until Jack was two and we'd be creating lots less waste that takes over 500 years to degrade.  

I don't know.  I'm not bothered at all about the prospect of extra laundry (more on our fantastic new washer and dryer in another post), and with the addition of a portable spray bidet-like toilet attachment ($40 and easy to install), I'm not even all that concerned about the yuck factor.  But Ben's threatened to strike and not do any of the poopy diapers if I "insist on persisting in this pointless crusade."  I'm not sure I'm willing to risk that actually happening.

Thoughts on that, anyone?

Oh, and here's the "woof, woof," I promised.  It has changed a little since he started in that he used to get his head into the action so much that he looked like he was frantically nodding as he said it.  But I think it's equally cute now.

 

Dancing, talking, and other random thoughts

Jack has developed some new dance moves.  Tops on the list of things he can now do is spinning around in a circle.  It's not a really new development--he's been doing it a few weeks--but he's getting a lot of practice dancing to some musical greeting cards that we've been given.  He's done it hundreds of times now, but every time he cracks open a card and hears the music start he's still amazed.  His favorite is a birthday card Ben got from my parents that plays "I'm So Excited."  Strange that probably 15 years after it came out I still can't hear that song without thinking about the Saved By The Bell episode where Jessie gets addicted to caffeine pills ("I'm so excited, I'm so excited, I'm so...scared!").

Jack's favorite noise is now "woof, woof."  He says that any time he sees a dog, sees one of his stuffed animal dogs, hears the word "dog," or I think any time he even thinks about a dog (this happens frequently).  I'll definitely get video of that soon, because he puts his whole head and body into the effort of saying it, and unlike many words at this stage it's fairly easy to understand, even by people who don't spend much time around toddlers.

His second favorite word is "keys," which sounds like a slightly spittle-filled version of "dees."  Jack has always loved electronic things with buttons.  Cell phones are tops with Blackberries the best of all.  A few weeks ago he managed to sit through almost all of a church service without a peep because we let him take the remote with him.  This from a boy who sees maybe 15 minutes of TV a week.  But keys have been quickly moving up the rungs of coveted items to play with since we moved back to America.  Now that we have cars (unlike in London), keys are much more interesting to Jack.  "Why?" you may ask?  Because car keys generally have red buttons, and those red buttons make cars honk and lights flash.  Some babies might be scared by such commotion.  Not Jack.  He loves it.  He's even more thrilled with Nonna's keys that have a button to make her car's trunk pop open.  

When we go anywhere, Jack is always pointing out people's keys.  This can be great while standing in line at Subway or Target or the grocery store--Jack says "dees" and points, the person holding the keys smiles and remarks on how clever and cute he is, and presto 30 seconds have passed in which I've been holding Jack without having to struggle to keep him from trying to jump out of my arms.  At other times his fascination with keys is not so convenient.  The week before the Mass of the remote, the guy in front of us put his keys on the pew, so Jack squirmed and pointed and yelled "dees" every time we stood up and he saw the keys.  I had never realized just how many times we Catholics stand up and sit down.  Poor Jack was so tormented.  

Now for the random thoughts section of this post.  We finally have a lawn!  Our sod was supposed to be put in a week after we closed on our house, but frequent rain delayed that until about a week ago.  But now we have several feet of yard.  Tiny by Midwestern standards, but it's a massive garden by London's take, and even fairly good sized for New England homes.  With the addition of sod, Jack has been introduced to the world of sprinklers.  He jumps right into the spray with no hesitation, regardless of what he's wearing.

We live in a row of 10 brand new houses, the earliest of which was completed last August.  Our neighbors are great.  We certainly can't replace Rich and Stacy and Kaia (Stacy, puzzlingly, keeps laughing when I say the house next door is still for sale), but we know everyone and we've become friends with several of the families.  Two more families just moved in this week, so Jack and I are off to be the welcome wagon this afternoon.

On a very random note, about thirty minutes ago I started reading "The Feminine Mystique" for the first time ever.  I'm not quite sure how I got this far in this life of mine without having read it.  But even reading just the first five pages, I am floored that it was written all of 45 years ago (when JFK was still President!).  It could very well have been written last year.  It's incredible.  So after having reading Perfect Madness and starting this and having tips on a few other good liberal mommy tomes, I've decided that I need to start a feminist stay-at-home moms' book club, because I'm dying to talk about the issues raised in each of the books with other like-minded women.  I'm just slightly worried that it might be a little hard to find membership for this bookclub... 

A Day in the Life

We have the potential to lose internet for who knows how long (we're trying to switch from phone-based to non-phone-based DSL, and I'm not counting on AT&T to get anything done on the time frame they say they will, given their previous incompetence), so I figured I'd better get a post in first.

So here's a video diary of a day in Jack's life--pieced together from several days, but an accurate representation nonetheless.

Jack wakes up at around 7 a.m. and makes sweet chirping noises in his crib until Ben or I pick him up and bring him into our bed for a cuddle.

Then Jack tells us that he wants food, so we go downstairs for breakfast together.

He then quickly tells us that he wants more.  And that he wants milk.  But he's still a little confused about the milk sign meaning milk from a cup and not milk from me--we're working on it.  He also occasionally tells us he's done by signing "all done" but more often he does so by trying to climb out of his highchair.

After helping Daddy put on his socks (and putting on some himself), Jack waves bye-bye at the garage door and we head back inside to play a little or listen to some music.  The conductor-type move that he does early in the video below is Jack's made up sign for music.  The dog is a birthday present from my Grandma and has become one of Jack's favorites.
Morning nap time still comes pretty early (around 9), but it's starting to get shorter and later.  It's down to about an hour now, which barely gives me time to get a workout and shower in, a luxury I'm going to really miss when the morning nap fades away!  When he gets up, we have a small morning snack.  Jack normally isn't really dressed until after his mid-morning snack so that we avoid getting food all over his nice play clothes.

After nap time, Jack helps me with a few chores around the house.  Every time I open the dryer,

 Jack now removes the lint filter, hands it to me, waits for me to clean it, and then attempts to put it back in, which he's getting much better at.  I'm now a little wary of letting Jack keep the lint filter out, since we spent weekend before last trying to fish out a toy he had dropped down the dryer.  He's an excellent sweeper.  I took two sections out of a Swiffer,

 and Jack takes it everywhere with him.  He also continues to love the vacuum, although I'm using it less around him because I don't want it to give him a stuffy nose.  Jack also helps unload the dishwasher by handing me small dinner plates and silverware.  

Then we either play around the house or go on an adventure to the grocery store or Target.  Jack's starting to get very used to his carseat, something I had worried about since he had never really been in one while we lived in London.

By around 12:30, Jack's ready for lunch, and at 1:30 for his afternoon nap, which generally lasts until 3 or 3:30, depending on when he actually goes to sleep.

In the late afternoon we check the mail, go swimming (we're taking lessons this month!) or walk to the park.

Dinner comes early, around 5:30, usually before Ben gets home.  But by 6:30 bath time Ben's almost always home now (hooray!).  Then it's a couple of stories (Little Bunny's Bedtime or Good Morning, Good Night, then always Goodnight Moon) and singing the lullaby that Ben wrote for Jack before he was born.  Jack usually throws his binky and one or more of his toys out of his crib one or more times and makes tons of sweet coos before falling asleep around 7.

I love our little life.

Love a Mommy

Jack's cue to hug his teddy bear or other stuffed animal is "Love a (teddy, duckie, doggie, etc.)."  He takes the animal to his left shoulder, hugs it, and pats it on the back a few times with both hands, fingers extended.  It's really adorable.

So today Jack was playing in Mommy and Daddy's room while I was folding clothes, and he was really getting very pleased with himself at being able to step on and off an under-the-bed container that I had pulled out.  So I decided he needed a hug.  But when I held my arms out, instead of just standing there accepting my hug, Jack hugged me back.  I mean really squeezed me on my back and patted my shoulders!  It was the first time he's ever given a hug.  And it was incredible.  He topped it off with an unsolicited, wide open-mouthed kiss.  He's the sweetest baby ever. 

This video is totally unrelated but was part of another project I'm working on, and it was too cute not to share.  Jack's become a total chatterbox.  Oh, and this is not representative of his stair descending abilities.  Generally he's very good at it, especially for a boy who wasn't exposed to stairs really at all until less than two months ago.  Although we tried to get him to do the scoot down the stairs one at a time on his belly method (the only safe way for babies to go down stairs, as far as I'm concerned), Jack has now taken to sitting on each step individually, then standing on the lower step.  It's not quite like the scoot on the bottom method some babies use--Jack's is a very deliberate and carefully plotted maneuver.  At any rate, I present 13 month old Jack in a morning video.