accomplishing a lot

The past few days have been full of getting things done. I've been crossing things off my to-do list and Jack's been finding tons of things to play with that negate any need for all the great Christmas toys that we've already ordered. See the pictures at the side of Jack watching the washer tumble and rolling a diet Coke can all over the kitchen. This afternoon we played a game where I sat the can upright and Jack knocked it over. We did this for almost 15 minutes straight. I've set that can to the side so that no one opens that one for the next few days. Oh, and note the teddy bear footies on his pajamas. Jack has been wearing those pajamas for a few months but he just discovered the teddy bears and thinks they're hilarious--almost as funny as when I put one of his hats on my head. He recognizes that bears aren't supposed to be on his feet and I'm not supposed to be wearing his hats, which I think is pretty clever of him.


Wednesday we went to the NHS health clinic for a checkup and weigh in. I still can't get over the fact that we have tons of top-quality help there anytime we want it and don't have to pay a cent for it. I mean, taxes, but they're not all that much higher than we'd be paying in the U.S. But anyway, good news is that Jack has gained over a pound in the past 4 weeks, bringing him back up to almost the weight he should be.

Today Jack ate half a banana, half a pear, almost an entire avocado, a sweet potato cube, about 1/2 a cup of oat Cheerios, three teething biscuits, a rice cake, and a few handfuls of rice rigatoni, all with a small mommy tax levied. I list this not because I think you all particularly care, but in part to remind myself that overall he's probably getting enough to eat even though it only seems like he's getting small bits of food at great effort during each feeding. Without that reminder I still keep worrying that Jack's at the cusp of another hunger strike. In an effort to avert that, I've started giving him more finger foods. He normally doesn't feed himself (except Cheerios--those are making it in his mouth at a rate more like 9 out of 10 now, which is a pretty impressive leap from 1 out of 10 less than a week ago), but he still seems to like chunky food better than purees.

Thursday our new rug was delivered, putting me much more at ease about letting Jack climb on absolutely everything like he wants to do. Now we're starting the next step--teaching him how to fall well. He's doing a pretty good job. He's learned that the trick is to fall where the padding is, and he's even able to get there some of the time.

Ben's had an awful week at work, not making it home until after midnight several nights. He was able to come home for a few hours on Wednesday night when I sent him an email with the subject, "I think I broke my middle toe," (didn't--it was just jammed and only took a day of hobbling to heal, it just really hurt) but then he had to go back to work after Jack went to bed. Fortunately, Ben thinks he should have the weekend off (can't believe I'm saying that--I've really become

brainwashed by the law firm widow lifestyle), so tomorrow we're planning to celebrate my birthday early by going to Wagamama and then going on the London Eye. I'm a bit worried about the latter part, as I inherited a fear of heights from Pops, but hopefully since it's an enclosed pod it will feel just like flying in a plane, which is a-okay.

Mission impossible

My mission, and I choose to accept it, is to attempt to update you on the last five days before Jack wakes up from his afternoon nap in approximately 20 minutes, if I'm lucky. Here we go!



Friday: Went to lunch with our friends Karem and baby Keira in South Kensington. Had a lovely time. Jack wore his real shoes out for the first time, and actually looked more like a proper little boy than a baby, which was a bit surprising for me. The picture isn't the best of him, but it gives you an idea of how cute he must have looked when he wasn't making a goofy face.

Jack wasn't sleepy during my lunch with Karem, so he tore up pieces of paper (I've now taken to carrying a small, fat notebook so I can give him papers to play with. I think he honestly likes it better than most of his toys) and gnawed on the cool cucumbers from my salad. We discovered Jack's second bottom tooth is coming in.


Mom and Dad's travel plans were finalized--they're coming in on November 16 and leaving on November 26. Mom's already planning a real Thanksgiving meal, which will be a very welcome change from last year. Even though we went to a great dinner the Saturday after Thanksgiving last year, the actual day was anticlimactic. It was the day after we had found out we were having a boy, and I was so excited to buy baby boy clothes that I didn't think about cooking at all, and of course Ben didn't have the day off.


Saturday: Took Jack to his first soccer match at Fulham's Craven Cottage. We got there just after halftime, as we had free tickets and decided late that we were going. Just as we walked in, we had a perfect view of the other team scoring a wide open goal. Fortunately we were not bad luck, as Fulham scored two more goals in the remaining 40 minutes. Fairly exciting for footie. Afterwards Ben had to go into the office, so Jack and I went with him, and we both helped out before Jack fell fast asleep under Ben's desk.


Sunday: Went to mass at the Italian church. I've decided that everyone must think that Ben's Italian and I'm his non-Italian wife, as when we go up for communion, the priests and alter servers always speak to me in English and Ben in Italian. Spent the afternoon playing with food again, with little success of getting Jack to eat any of it. Ben had to go into the office all evening.



Jack had a terrible night's sleep. I decided that I would try feeding him milk or solids at least every 2 1/2 hours during the day so that he would get the idea that daytime is for eating and nighttime is for sleeping. I was pessimistic about that having much effect. I resigned myself to the idea of forcing him to go at least 4 hours between night feeds, even if that meant letting him cry a little at night. I was thoroughly convinced that I was a bad mommy who had taught my son terrible sleep habits and would have to live with the consequential lack of sleep for the next 3-4 years. It was a really depressing thought.



Monday: Jack decided at lunch time that he wanted to eat my soup. It was tomato-based, so I was slightly worried that the acidity would do awful things to his stomach. But it was organic and didn't have any no-no allergy-causing foods, and I wasn't all that crazy about it myself, so I kept feeding him until he was no longer interested. Half the bowl later, he stopped. Amazing. Ruined the white onesie he was wearing, but that's a small price to pay. It gave me a chance to dress him in his Mizzou outfit with shorts just like his Uncle Tyler's. He got into the tiger spirit by continuing to growl, a move sure to scare away all Jayhawks except his Godmother Melanie.

Later that evening, over the course of about an hour, I got him to eat almost an entire cube of peas, by eating some myself, then offering them to him. As I was explaining the day to Ben that night, I realized that it's really tough to feed him like that--I end up spending the entire time worrying that I'm going to offer too much food, too soon, or in a way that he won't like, and that that will cause him to completely shut down and refuse to eat anymore. By the end of the night, I was a wreck, still convinced that I would never sleep again.



Tuesday: Jack slept like an angel last night. He slept from 9-11:30, 12-almost 6, then 6:15-9:30. Incredible. As luck would have it, I couldn't sleep for half the night, but I did get some good sleep during his long sleeping stretch, only briefly interrupted by a cough at 2:30 that sounded like he was dying (He wasn't. I checked. And checked again. And almost woke him up checking a third time.). I am relieved to know that my desire to cuddle my baby to sleep is not the issue preventing us all from getting a good night's sleep and to know that he can eat, and when he does eat, he can sleep. Whew! Also really glad I didn't have to try to let him cry himself back to sleep. Don't know that I could have actually done that, even if I did check on him every few minutes.


At 11:30 this morning, Jack was really tired, so I put him in his crib still awake, and he fell asleep for his morning nap on his own without crying at all! During that nap, I took the luxury of cooking a real lunch for myself--honey wasabi salmon, baked sweet potatoes (okay, that was partially for Jack, too), couscous, and even a small glass of red wine. So amazing to feel like I can do that instead of having to sleep every second!




This afternoon we went to Clerkenwell Green, a small park around the corner, where Jack discovered grass. After talking to mom about Tyler's eating habits as a baby, I thought I might give Jack a try at feeding himself, to see if he just wanted to be a little more independent. He certainly tries to assert control while drinking milk, so I figured it wouldn't hurt to try. We brought along chunks of banana and sweet potato, which we fed to one another in small pieces. Jack really seemed to get a kick out of feeding me, as if it was a completely absurd thing for a baby to feed his mommy.



Mission accomplished! Score one for Mommy.

the union Jack gives in

Jack's hunger strike has ended!

Aku the health visitor is my hero. She came by at noon today for an hour! After asking about Jack's lifelong sleep history and eating habits, she said she thinks he'll be able to sleep again just fine as soon as he starts eating again. And instead of just saying I need to keep trying different foods and textures and tastes (done that) and "persevere" (I now hate that word) like everyone else said, she offered a great suggestion.

She said Jack's throat infection when he had that virus a few weeks ago probably created a psychological aversion to food, since swallowing hurt then, which makes sense. So she suggested that I let Jack play with food without pressing the eating issue, and since he puts everything in his mouth anyway, some food might end up there as well. Brilliant--just brilliant!

So tonight I set out pots of lots of different foods on a splash mat and let Jack go to town. He loved it! He was thrilled to hold his own spoon and feed himself, even if most of his attempts went more into his ear than his mouth. And he let me feed him half a cube each of sweet potato and squash, along with several bites of plum, one or two of pears, and even quite a bit of parsnips! I had thought Jack was still too young to feed himself, but apparently he had different ideas. So in these pictures you can see the joyful result. I'm normally anti-naked baby pictures, but he has a diaper, and I was too excited that he was eating to care. I'm especially fond of the raised eyebrow on the second one. If nothing else, this baby has character.

And as a special bonus today, you get two videos. The first video is of Jack trying to blow raspberries with food in his mouth, and the second one is raspberries with Jack's new characteristic grunt at the end. He started
making this sound a few days ago, and hasn't stopped much since then. He was especially insistent on doing it last night while he was in costume. Though Ben and I tried to explain to him that spiders don't really growl, he seemed to disagree.

We're also taking action on a few more fronts. We may be hiring a housekeeper to come in a few hours a week. And I think Mom and Dad (Nonna and Pops) are going to come over for a week at the end of the month--they actually sound somewhat excited about taking responsibility for the night shift, and since Rich and Stacy will be away in Boston, Ben and I will be able to escape down the hall to an empty flat to get a few much-needed full nights of sleep.

Now let's just hope this means he'll start sleeping better. I'm not holding my breath on this yet as I think he has another tooth coming through (top left, lots of drooling and fussing all day, and he was super-clingy, never letting me put him down), but at least one problem is solved and the other should follow soon.