Peace

This has been a terrific week for Jack.  I mean, really wonderful.  He has been eating and he has been sleeping.  Sounds basic enough.  But he's been doing both really, amazingly well.  At nap time (around 10:30 and 2:30, although he's pretty flexible about it), I read him a book and then Good Night Moon, sing the lullaby Ben wrote for Jack, then put him in his crib and close the door.  It's as easy as that and I don't hear a peep from him for at least an hour!  Bedtime is just as easy with slightly more ritual before we start in on our books.  I can't tell you how much easier this is making my life!

And mealtimes are much better, too.  After discussing with Stacy the stress of meals, she suggested that I pay close attention to any tension I might be communicating to Jack.  I realized that there were some clues I was giving that might make him a little nervous, but I wasn't quite sure what to do to relax.  Then last weekend Ben pointed out that even though Jack's weight looks less than stellar on the percentage curve of the growth graph, he's really only about 3 pounds away from what would be considered perfectly normal growth.  Even on a 17 pound baby, that's nothing!  It could be a difference caused by weighing him pre- as opposed to post-meal or pre- or post-dirty diaper.  So I've relaxed a ton, and, at least partly due to that, Jack has been a spectacular eater this week.  He's started to love oatmeal with yogurt and fruit for breakfast, and today and Wednesday (no-meat days because of Lent), I had fish and chips and gave him an entire fish of his own (with breading peeled off) to eat.  Both days he's finished it!  I feel a growth spurt coming on, so I'm getting serious about lifting weights again.  Hopefully he'll give me a little lead time.

Oh, and Jack's wave has now added a new dimension of urgency to his "pick me up" signal.  When he's on the floor wanting to be picked up, Jack gets up on his knees and thrusts his arms over his head repeatedly--a fairly universal sign for "pick me up."  But now that he's learned to wave, he's started bouncing up and down and waving his left hand, as if to indicate that he's really serious this time.  Adorable.  I've been trying to get good video of it but have thus far failed because as soon as he sees the camera, Jack's desire to grab it supercedes his desire to be picked up.

This afternoon we're off to playgroup.

A Week of Learning

Jack has developed a ton of new skills this week.  It's seriously been one of the most amazing developmental weeks in a long time.  And all of this despite his injury and a yucky cold that kept him down all weekend.  Friday morning at about 1 a.m. Jack developed yet another one of his unfortunately frequent high fevers.  Every time I checked from then until Sunday afternoon, his temperature was above 101, and it spiked up to over 103.  His accompanying stuffy nose kept him from sleeping well all weekend--Ben and I took shifts sleeping with Jack--but it's finally started to clear up for good this afternoon.

I was terrified that he was developing an infection in his toe.  But an NHS doctor assured me that it looked fine.  And he added as a parting comment that I needed to make sure and look after myself as well.  I'm pretty sure there are notes on Jack's file saying that I'm a hypochondriac about my baby and that I'm teetering on the brink of a nervous breakdown.  Last time I went to that doctor's office, I said that Jack wasn't sleeping and he sounded like he was in pain.  The doctor I saw that day told me that 1) you can't tell whether a baby's in pain based on the way he cries, and 2) no babies sleep and that if I ever talked to other mothers I would know both of those things.  I was highly insulted as I do, in fact, talk to other mothers and 1) every single one of them has scoffed at the doctor's statement about not being able to distinguish pained cries, and 2) all their babies wake up at most 3-4 times a night, still worthy of complaint (say your baby wakes up 1-2 times a night and you'll get absolutely no sympathy from me), but not like Jack.  I like Dr. Hay better--I just wish he wasn't so hard to get in to see on short notice.

On the sleep front--knock on wood--Jack has made great strides.  Before his injury last Wednesday, Jack had started going to sleep very easily and slipping back into sleep quickly.  He was still waking up 5 times or more a night, but he was causing less fuss.  Sometimes I was able to leave his room after only a minute or two after just laying him down and without even patting him on the back!  That wasn't true every night, and he was having at least one wake a night that was longer and louder even than before, but it still seemed like progress.  Tonight he has resumed that pattern of going to sleep immediately, and so far he's been asleep for over 3 hours straight with no waking!

On Thursday Jack started waving.  His first wave was to Kaia as she and Stacy were leaving after a pre-dinner quick catch-up.  At times his "wave" looks more like he's shaking his fist, though, and only his smile indicates he's not angry!  

On Sunday Jack added a semi-regal looking wave to one of his favorite activities--trying to push his stroller--and I was able to snap a picture of it.  

Ben thinks Jack's desire to push his stroller indicates he's ready for a little brother or sister.  I'm thinking he may have to wait a while.

The wave also occasionally morphs into and out of a modified version of pointing that also just started this week.  I say modified because instead of using his index finger to point the thing he wants or is interested in, Jack uses his entire fist.  But as usual, his actions leave no doubt about what he wants.

Sometime on Friday Jack went from mostly saying "mamamamama" and "dadadadadada" to also saying "nananananana," 

a development my mom, Jack's Nonna, is thrilled about.  None of his sounds are real first words yet, because he doesn't seem to connect the sounds to any meaning--for instance he has used "nana" to indicate everything from his banana to the humidifier to the trash can--but it's still exciting to hear.

Also sometime on Friday Jack and I were listening to a James Taylor CD, and Jack started shaking his Cheerio container along to the beat!  Who knows whether or not that was intentional, but he seemed to be enjoying himself and for once was content to play with the container without having some Cheerios in hand.

Today Jack finally started to develop a concept of putting things into containers.  Taking things out has been a favorite pastime for several weeks now, but finally things are starting to go back in again.  Not where they're supposed to be, but I expect we'll be working on that for approximately the next decade.

Monday we went back to the doctor to have Jack's toe looked at again, and he said it's fine.  The bandage is off and it doesn't seem to be hurting him much at all.  Thursday, the day after his

accident, I was determined that Jack should have a day of rest.  It was storming outside, so it looked perfect for a sleepy, cookie-baking day.  Jack didn't seem to think this was a good idea.  I hid his walker behind the curtains, thinking that it would be best if he stayed off his feet as much as possible.  Not only did Jack find the walker, but when I took it away again, he started climbing the curtains.  Literally.  Somehow I don't think this is going to slow down his march toward independent walking. 

A Boo Boo for My Baby

So I was all set to spend the post-Jack's bedtime, pre-my bedtime period tonight writing a great blog entry about all the great things Jack has been up to.  His constant walking everywhere (now only using a hand to edge along the wall, not even needing furniture.  His expanding dietary experiments--Saturday we had blueberry banana pancakes and eggs as a whole family (!), Jack now eats, among other things, hummus, cottage cheese, and dried figs, and he can now feed himself bananas, mini bagels, and pears.

And his adorable new incarnations of the desire to take things out of containers.  

Yesterday he emptied every one of Ben's pairs of athletics socks 

from their basket on the floor of Ben's closet.  Today when we got our grocery order, Jack unloaded his own groceries!  He found the Ella's Kitchen packets (my one foray into premade

 baby food) in the sacks on the kitchen floor and proceeded to take them all out of the sack and line them up neatly!  Then he tried very, very hard to open the screw tops.  That's when I knew it was time for lunch.

Or all the fun play dates we've been having--lunch with Karem and Keira on Monday, going to the indoor playground at the National Army Museum (I know it sounds weird, but they have a totally gun-free soft play area for babies there, oddly enough) with our Abi and Leila playgroup on Tuesday.

But those blogging plans changed about 5:30 tonight when Jack split open the big toe on his right foot.  He's fine, just to let you know, lest I give all of you who haven't heard the story a heart attack.  I was making his dinner and Jack was playing in the kitchen on the floor beside me.  He really likes to stand up and play with things on the bottom two pantry shelves (the ones he can reach), so I try to keep lots of baby-friendly items there--lots of lids, a bag of marshmallows, some pop cans for him to roll around, a wooden spoon and light mixing bowls, etc.  But I hadn't noticed that there were also a few cans of soup on the second shelf.  While he was playing, one of the cans came crashing down on Jack's toe and really banged it up.  At the risk of being too graphic, it created a cut that went through his toenail and over the tip of his toe.  Not a wide cut, but probably about 1/2 an inch long, which looks massive on his tiny little foot!  

There was blood (probably not a lot, but it felt like it), and Jack was screaming, and I was terrified.  I called Ben, who couldn't hear anything except Jack wailing and me saying "Come home now!"  Then called 999 (the UK's 911).  The ambulance came right away (at home I wouldn't have even called one since I would have a car to take him to the ER myself, since it wasn't anywhere near life-threatening), but Stacy and Kaia fortuitously arrived before them, which really saved my sanity.  Jack has stopped crying and was just looking slightly sad after about 5 minutes, long before Stacy even arrived.  The medic was the largest man I think I've ever seen in my life, which was a bit surreal, but he was very gentle and said it wasn't anything to be that concerned about but that they could take us to the hospital if we wanted.  By then Ben had arrived home and we decided to go to the hospital just to have it looked at.  

By the time we got to the hospital, Jack was smiling and laughing and eating Cheerios.  While the doctor examined him, Jack was standing up, even putting weight on his injured foot.  No stitches necessary, just a little bit of tape and a bandage three times the size of his toe.  When we got home, he went straight to bed.  Throughout the entire ordeal he didn't even have any Tylenol!  What an amazingly resilient little boy we have.  I just wish my mommy guilt for letting him get hurt was as easily put aside...

A social baby

We joined two playgroups this week.  For the past 3 months I've been organizing playgroups for the KCWC, but we hadn't joined any of the groups yet since all of them are so far away.  Most of our friends (except Stacy and Kaia) live and both playgroups were held a 30 minute plus tube ride away.  I had hoped that I would feel more up to tackling that commute after Jack started sleeping through the night.  Guess we won't know that for a while.

At any rate, the babies seem nice enough, and I really like the other moms in both groups, which is the important part.  Until babies start having real interactive play (usually around 18 months) playgroups are for moms, not babies.  And I've been needing some adult interaction--the past three nights Ben has come home past 4 a.m.  One group is going to meet Tuesday afternoons and the other is Thursday mornings.  They have slightly different dynamics, as Tuesday's moms are slightly younger (though all still at least a few years older than me) and two moms in the Thursday group each have a toddler in addition to their baby.  But all of the women are amazingly worldwise and interesting.  One's from New Zealand, two are Brits married to Americans, one was born in Hong Kong, and the other two grew up within two hours' drive from me, bizarrely enough since we're 5,000 miles from home.

On a less sociable note, I promise you I didn't put him up to it, but today Jack met a baby whose parents are Republicans from Kansas, and Jack attacked him.  I mean multiple times, he started trying to crawl all over the poor little boy!  Well, not exactly little--the baby is two months older than Jack and probably near twice Jack's weight.  But still.  I've seen him like that a few times with Kaia, but never any other time.  So my query is whether this demonstrates Jack's a) loyalty to Mizzou, b) loyalty to the Democratic party, or c) pain from getting his top two teeth (finally!). 

It has me slightly concerned that Jack will attack the other boy at his birthday party in two weeks, thus following not-so-proudly in his mommy's footsteps.  Apparently I left Zach Knight with a few bite marks at his birthday party in preschool.  In my defense, he cornered Justin Glover and me and said he was a Hungry, Hungry Hippo and that he was going to eat us.  I ate first.

On Wednesday I took Jack to the NHS clinic to be weighed.  The news was not fabulous but not dire.  He's still only 16.5 pounds, which puts him in the bottom 1% of babies.  Everyone again kept assuring me that this isn't cause for alarm, but they want me to bring him back in two weeks to be weighed again.  He doesn't look really skinny, just small-boned, and he certainly has plenty of energy.  It's just really disheartening news in a week when I had been so excited because I felt like he was eating a ton.  The Health Visitor (like an RN) said if he keeps gaining weight this slowly, I might have to start adding mashed avocado (one of his favorites anyway) or cream to his food to try to bulk him up.  But that's still a ways away.  As it is, Jack has found several new foods he really likes.  I know I'll get groans and gags from the peanut gallery for this one, but Jack is particularly fond of pureed pears mixed with chopped green beans and tofu chunks.  Tonight in an early effort to add some weight to his frame, I gave Jack a few bites of pizza.  He was nonplussed but ate it.

Jack's weird new habit last week was making a lisping sputtering raspberry that sounds vaguely like Stan's retainer-wearing older sister on South Park.  Not the most glamorous of acts.  This week's weird new habit is sleeping sideways--his lays head to toe along the top of his crib rather than laying the long way.  It actually looks kind of cozy...

Ups and downs

The day after I last posted, after another really rough night, Ben and I decided to take a hard line on the sleep problem.  We resolved not to pick Jack up during the night so that he would get used to falling asleep in his own bed.  We didn't leave him to cry alone but instead stayed by him each time he woke up and patted him on the back until he went back to sleep.  I had looked at the Andrea Grace website again and realized that we were doing everything else she suggests there, so I figured we should try a little of that on our own.  No sense in paying $350 just to hear that we should be doing that, and it's not as if there's some magic solution that would make him sleep well immediately.  The first day of this new system both of his naps were preceded by a 45 minute struggle involving almost nonstop crying.  The first night he woke up at 3:30 (among other times) and couldn't fall asleep again until 5:30.  The next day wasn't much better, and I was starting to get really discouraged.  And I had an aching back--several hours a day of bending over Jack's crib wasn't pleasant for either of us.

I wouldn't say Jack's sleep problems are cured, but his nights are generally much better than before.  His sleeping is still somewhat unpredictable, so I fortunately haven't come to expect a lot of uninterrupted sleep.  That, I have found, can lead to feeling even more sleep deprived.

A few nights have been fantastic.  One night he woke up only twice in 10 hours!  He went to sleep at 8, woke up at 11:30, and then slept until 6, giving Ben and me 6 1/2 hours of uninterrupted snoozing.  Fantastic.  After an hour of trying to get him to go back to bed after that, we decided he was up for the day.  But I'll take an early wakeup call over several midnight ones any night.

So teaching Jack to sleep again was the all-consuming project of week before last, and last week's project was nursing Ben back to health after he caught a horrible stomach flu.  I have never seen Ben sicker, and he said he wasn't sure he'd ever felt sicker.  He stayed home Tuesday and Wednesday.  Unfortunately it was the kind of staying home sick that involves only sleeping and trying not to puke, not the fun kind of staying home sick where you read books and watch movies all day.  Somehow Jack and I managed to escape the worst of it, but we all had early bedtimes for a few days.

We have had time for a few new fun tricks in the past two weeks, though.  Jack is really into taking things out of containers.  He plays with his shape sorter toy that Nonna and Pops got him for Christmas a lot, although he hates having the lid on because he hasn't figured out how to put the shapes through it yet.  But his favorite thing to move around is clothes.  Jack now helps me unload the washer and dryer, and he frequently empties the hamper in both our room and his.  The washer and dryer help is 

He hasn't shown any interest in putting things in, just taking them out.

Another toy Nonna and Pops got Jack for Christmas has been a particular favorite the past few weeks.  It's a set of half-spheres that stack up, nest into one another, and click together to form wobbly balls.  We have spent hours and hours hiding toys under different pieces, forming balls of different sizes with different objects inside them, and practicing putting objects into the pieces when 

they're upside down.

Last Friday, as I predicted in the last post, Jack stood up by himself for the first really long time.  Stacy and Kaia were over for a playdate (Stacy has Fridays off, so we have taken to spending most of the day together), and Jack was crawling through his highchair after Kaia, when he stopped, turned, and looked at us, then let go and stood.  Stacy and I looked at him, at each other, and back again several times, and Jack must have stood there for 15 or 20 seconds before wobbling and dropping down on his bottom.  Quite impressive.  Since then he hasn't done another long stand, but he does several short ones daily.

Jack also loves the walker we got him for Christmas.  If I didn't offer him other toys and occasionally hide the walker from view, he would spend all day every day practicing on it.  (By the way, if anyone knows all the words to "The Farmer in the Dell," could you please send them to me?  All I remember is the basic first verse, the farmer takes a wife, and the cheese stands alone.  Everything else is out the window.  Since I hear it a good 20-30 times a day, it would be nice to have a little more to sing... )

As you can see, he concentrates really hard (see open mouth), seems to enjoy it a lot, and has gotten pretty fast.  I know, I know, he'll be walking before we know it.  Actually I really do think he'll be walking on his own by mid to late February.  He's already cruising around the room with only one hand on furniture like it's no big deal.  It's lots of fun, but sometimes I long for the days when sitting in his swing was his favorite form of "active" entertainment.  That took a lot less energy.