Muggy Days Are Happy Days

Yesterday as we were getting ready to leave for church, Jack went outside to check the weather. He proclaimed it "hot" and I added that it also felt very muggy. Jack looked slightly confused and responded, "I don't see any mug outside." A few weeks ago after a pre-preschool weather check, we talked about foggy and muggy weather, but apparently we didn't talk about it quite enough!

Despite the recent heat and humidity, we've had some great news around here. Last Wednesday Ben gave two weeks notice to Bryan Cave! He's officially leaving law firm life and is going to be an in-house attorney for a technology company called Savvis. Ben's excited and I'm thrilled that his hours will probably be shorter and will definitely be more predictable.

Graham also seems to be very happy of late. He's full of gorgeous smiles and adorable coos. I have yet to catch either on camera yet, though not for lack of trying. I'm especially fond of his Harrison Ford-esque half smiles that light up his eyes--it completely transforms his face.

A New Baby Boy

This morning I was moved by a Real Simple email quote of the day to start blogging again. "If you wait to do everything until you're sure it's right, you'll probably never do much of anything." Win Borden said that, and I'm impressed by the thought though I have no idea who that person is. I'm hoping that keeping this in mind will allow me to move beyond perfectionism that leads to no posts being finished into mediocre but consistent record keeping. We'll see. I'm intending to eventually change the blog name and address to reflect our growing family, but before doing that I think I'll make sure I can actually manage updates.

Most important things first. It doesn't seem like it's been nearly that long, but almost two months ago Graham Joseph Angelette made his first appearance. He was born at 11 a.m. on Saturday, April 17, just four days after Jack turned three and five days before Ben turned 30. At birth, Graham was 7 lbs., 1 oz., which is exactly what Jack weighed, and at 20 inches, he was just slightly longer/taller than Jack.

Labor with Graham was longer than with Jack by a few hours (2 p.m. until 11 a.m. as opposed to 7 a.m. to 11 p.m.), but it was only really difficult or painful for an hour or two, while for Jack's birth I was in significant (though epidural-managed) pain for at least 6 hours. Much easier second time around. In fact I very nearly made it without an epidural, despite having several artificial labor-inducing practices thrown at me, including heavy pitocin use and rupturing of the amniotic sac. I also recovered a lot faster, which I've heard from other second-time moms is common. Fifteen to twenty pounds of extra weight's still hanging around, but not bad for having gained about 40-45, and it's coming off pretty steadily without any effort. Graham, on the other hand, has been gaining weight like a champ. At his two week checkup he weighed 8 lbs., 6 oz.! That's almost 2 ounces of weight gain a day, and our pediatrician said he'd be happy with a weight gain of an ounce a day.

He is thus far a very happy and easy baby. He's just starting to smile a lot and his coos and gurgles are adorable, especially when he's talking to the baby in the mirror above his swing. He rarely cries, though he absurdly cried through his entire baptism, punctuating the screaming with a very loud burp and massive spit-up all over the front of my shirt and skirt at the end of the ceremony. It was so out of character and over-the-top that Ben and I just had to laugh. Adding to the absurdity, Graham quieted as soon as we stepped down from the altar and sleep-smiled at us during prayer after communion.

He's also a pretty good sleeper. Daytime naps usually require a sling or swing to start, but the past few days I've been able to transfer him to the Moses basket without waking him. A few times (like now) I've even managed to get the boys to take partially overlapping afternoon naps, so that each one gets individual time and I still get a little time to myself. And though he's certainly not sleeping through the night, Graham fairly consistently sleeps for a 4 1/2 to 5 hour stretch and for 2 1/2 to 3 hours two more times at night, so he's only waking about twice at night. One night, around 6 weeks, he even made it from 11 p.m. until 4:30 a.m., and I was able to sleep that entire time, too! In comparison, Jack was 7 months old before I was able to sleep that long in one chunk. The best part of his sleeping habits is that his night wakes are brief--a 30 minute feed, a diaper change, and he's instantly back to sleep with no rocking or soothing fussiness required.

Ben had six weeks of paternity leave, which was a blessed, blessed reprieve from the real world for all of us. My mom was then here last week, so this week has been my first at home alone with the boys. And it's gone better than I expected. We've had more good days than bad, despite a few yelling incidents (several by Jack, one from me) and the persistent feeling that all I do all day is feed little boys and clean their bottoms.

Jack is a terrific big brother. We had a few weeks of fairly regular tantrums (including one 45 minute one that culminated in Jack screaming at Ben, "I want you to go away and not come back EVER AGAIN!" repeatedly for 20 minutes), his sleeping still isn't back to normal (though he's not waking us at night, thank goodness), and he's picked up a few odd bad habits (right now he's constantly sucking on his hands), but all in all he's taking it in stride. His preschool teachers said that of the 5 kids in the class who had new siblings this semester, Jack seemed the least fazed by it--aside from carrying around a doll all day at school for a few weeks, his behavior was completely consistent.

The best part is that Jack has never been anything but incredibly gentle and loving with Graham. Jack's had a few things to learn, like not running or jumping near Graham's head when Graham's laying on the floor and not throwing things to Ben or me when we're holding Graham. But Jack's never done anything even remotely malicious and has stopped all potentially hurtful behavior with just a few warnings.

It's really sweet to see, because Jack must kiss Graham on the head at least 30 times a day and speaks in parentese to him all the time. The other day I heard Jack prompting Graham, "Do you have a smile in there? Do you? Oh, yes you do, don't you? How about a smile for me?" in the best mimic of me that I've heard in a long time. The funniest, though, was a week or so ago when Jack found a miniature Boppy pillow intended to be used for babies' tummy time. Jack decided it was a "Jack-sized breastfeeding pillow" and immediately put it around his waist, which it did, in fact, fit perfectly. He then grinned and said, "Momma, now I can feed Graham, too. I put him on here and then lift up my shirt. But, oops, sorry, I don't have any breasts." I'm pretty sure that's verbatim.

So even though this isn't completely finished and I haven't written all I want, the boys are starting to stir from their naps, and I'm posting. Now the hiatus is hopefully over, as adorable things I want memories of are happening on a daily basis (at least) and things are starting to get a little more sane around here (knock on wood). A Graham photo montage for your enjoyment:

P.S. - A Jack activity update: This morning Jack "drove" the Lexus while I was getting Graham into his carseat and loading the stroller into the trunk. He does this fairly often, so 1) we keep our cars locked even while they're in the garage in case Jack gets the urge to run away, and 2) it's not uncommon to start the car and have the radio blaring and/or the windshield wipers on full tilt. But this morning he explored new buttons; as I backed out of the driveway, I realized that my GPS was set to speak French.

Preparing for Graham

As a side note of background information, sometime while we were somewhere in New Orleans for Mardi Gras Jack lost his toy Thomas engine. You don't need to feel too sorry for him, however, because 1) he still has two other engines and multiple other train cars to play with, and 2) I've been constantly reminding him that maybe he'll get a new one for his birthday in a few weeks (I've already got that one covered).

A few days ago I was talking to Jack about how Graham getting here would bring a lot of changes, and many of them will be very fun. I'll be able to chase and play tag with Jack more and I'll have a bigger lap for him to sit in. I then mentioned that Graham would come with "the best gift in the world," referring to the fact that Ben will be home with us on paternity leave for six weeks. Jack immediately looked up at me and asked, "Is Thomas the best gift in the world?"

It's fading fast, but Jack still has a few mispronunciations that I find completely adorable. One day he came home from preschool telling me that they had learned about snowmen and had had "mosh-a-moes" for snack. It took me a few minutes to realize that he was talking about marshmallows, but since then they've become a frequently requested treat in our house.

Wednesday night I got my new Momma haircut--not that much different but a few inches shorter with a few more layers. Ben was at home getting Jack ready for bed. As they finished reading Jack's second story of the night, Jack asked if he could have some socks because his feet were cold. When Ben responded, "Oh, yes, of course. I forgot," Jack replied in a very serious tone, "Momma never forgets."

The nursery is completely finished now and has been for a few weeks, thanks to the fact that a few friends' early labors prompted me to have intense nesting instincts all during January and February. Even though Graham will be in our room in a Moses Basket at first and won't move in for another six months or so, I have to say I'm fairly proud of how nicely the nursery has turned out and how quickly we were able to get it pulled together. When Jack was born we were living in a rented flat, so our ability to decorate was limited. We couldn't paint, the odd-sized windows already had curtains on them, and the bright orange carpet ruined any possibility of a seamlessly integrated traditional baby theme/color scheme. Thus it was extra fun for me to plan out Graham's nursery, complete with dual colors on the wall and added chair rail, matching furniture, and a (subtle) woodland creatures theme.

Jack's Take on Graham's Motivations

As I was reading Jack his bedtime story tonight, Graham developed a serious case of the "wiggles." (Calling them wiggles seems a bit disingenuous, and even "kicks" is fairly tame; this little boy, just like his big brother, is a dynamo in utero! It's more like double back flips with a jab to the ribs as a chaser.) Jack, who was leaning back on me started feeling Graham's movements, so I asked if he wanted to feel Graham moving with his hands. Jack's hands reached my belly just in time for a big leap, and he burst out laughing, saying, "He's trying to jump out! Graham is trying to give me a kiss, but he's still in your belly!" His joy was adorably contagious.

Preschool is going very well. Jack seems to love it, both of us are meeting lots of new friends, and I'm finding out just how much I can get done in 2 1/2 hours without having to pull Jack in and out of his carseat at every stop. It's amazing to me that he comes home singing songs I've never heard and having read books I didn't read to him.

Also amazing me last week was when we were driving back from a downtown visit to Ben and Jack pointed to a road saying, "That's where Miss Kelly and Uncle Stephen's school is!" And he was right! Let me also specify that not only was the law school not visible from the turnoff, not only had even I forgotten exactly which turnoff it was, not only was there no sign to tip him off, but Jack had only been there once! When I asked how on earth he remembered that, Jack matter-of-factly told me that he had gone there with Miss Kelly and they threw pennies in the fountain but that the bookstore had been closed.

In other news, potty training seems to be pretty well finished. Hip, hip, hooray! Jack has not worn diapers or pullups since Christmas, not even at night! Though he's still having about two accidents a week at home, he's only had one at school. I cannot describe how incredibly nice it is to have even a few months' break from changing diapers! Now I just have to get geared up to go back to the 8-12 a day pace of a newborn... I'm so glad Ben has six weeks paternity leave!

School Days, Snow Days, and Sick Days

Today was Jack's first day of preschool! It was only a visit day, so I spent the whole time with him in class, and we were only there for about half the normal time, but I think Jack's really going to enjoy school. He was very excited to don his penguin backpack and was thrilled to learn that they have a train table at school. Due in large part to the massive number of train-related Christmas gifts Jack received, trains have once again taken center stage in his daily routine; he spent the entire school visit time playing at the train table.

Actually the first day of school was supposed to be last Thursday, but St. Louis got a few inches of snow Wednesday night, which resulted in every school in the county closing for two days. So Jack's first school day was a snow day.

Fortunately, this week worked out better for us anyway, because if it hadn't been a snow day, last Thursday probably would have been a sick day. The three of us have spent at least two of the past four weeks suffering from several rounds of colds. Jack was only a little sniffly, having mostly recovered from a sinus infection, but I was coughing every 2 minutes, barely able to talk from a sinus infection that moved into my ears and throat. I don't think I would have been a very welcome fixture at visiting day.

Jack will be going to school two days a week for 2 1/2 hours, which should be just the right amount of time for him to have some independence and meet some new friends. Jack separates so easily from me (being so nonchalant about it that it occasionally hurts my feelings, though intellectually I know that it's a very good developmental milestone) that I think preschool should be a ton of fun for him without the trauma that can sometimes accompany spending time away from home alone for the first time. At least I don't expect him to be the clingy kid crying and saying, "No, Momma, don't go!" at drop off time, though I am wondering if he'll have some tension that will show up in other ways in the next few weeks.

On the baby front, we think we've settled on Graham as a first name, though we're still looking for a middle name that fits well with it. I'm 25 weeks and up about that many pounds, and Graham's about the size of an eggplant. He's wiggling away (we've started saying "wiggling" instead of the more traditional "kicking" because Jack seemed very upset at the idea that his little brother would kick me), sometimes waking me up a few times a night, usually strong enough for Ben to feel, and occasionally contorting himself enough to making my stomach look lopsided. Oh, and thanks to his classmates, if Jack doesn't quite get the little brother thing yet, he should understand a little better by the time Graham is born; of the 13 kids in his class, at least 5 have mothers who are pregnant! Four of us are due in April, with Graham coming in at the last expected arrival date.